Sex tourism & sex in Thailand

If you are less than 18, you’re welcome to choose any other article of my Thailand travel guide – this is a practical guide for adults that won’t be interesting to you. I’ve got no hot pics here either – I’m not into capturing nude people and publishing portraits of the staff without their permission, at least this is not correct, especially for Thais who are so sensitive about “saving face”.

For the adults I will tell everything about sex tourism in Thailand: how does it work, where to go, what to do and how to avoid scam. This article suits all genders and all sexual orientations. Well, I suppose, this is the longest article at FalkTime. That’s why I will highlight keywords with bold font (+ headers + blue fields) for those who are in a hurry.

Contents

Terms that I will use

  • Staff or employee or worker – relates to any sex-worker (prostitute) of any gender and age (boy, girl, transgender etc).
  • Services – mostly sex services, but also escort services (to accompany you on your visit to a beach/café/night club, to work as interpreter etc). This is only about your and his/her business, what services will be included in your agreement. But generally most of workers can be hired for any of these services.
  • Bar – go-go bar, a place with primary aim of offering you a choice of staff for hiring, besides drinking alcohol. A brothel.
  • Terms that will be equal in context of Thai sex workers: transsexual = transgender = shemale = ladyboy = katheoy = MtF. As FtM are kind of exotics for this business all over the world.

Common details about the staff, bars and hiring

Sex tourism is well-developed only in major tourist destinations. The main sex destination is Pattaya – cheap and the biggest choice. In the rest of destinations (Bangkok, Phuket, Hua Hin etc) bars are not spread as chaotically as in Pattaya. F.e. in Bangkok go-go bars are located only in several neighborhoods.

Prostitution in Thailand is illegal and disapproved by society. That’s why most of the staff come from other (far) settlements: they protect their relatives from the knowledge about the real occupation. Even if an employee was constantly supporting his/her parents sharing his income, s/he can become a reject. Good deeds won’t be counted. And this is the reason for prohibition of pictures and videos in most of bars. While corruption turns illegal business to a legal one.

These facts affect the attitude of locals to sex – libido is high, southern blood is hot, but mindset makes them to be ashamed of their wishes. Do not expect perfect performance from every worker. Thousands of tourists come here not for perfect sex. Sex hunger can be easily satisfied anywhere, Thai workers deal with much more difficult issue: they satisfy the need in care and tender attitude. So whether you want it or not, in Thailand you are at the highest risk of stepping into unhealthy relationship. I will go back to this risk later (see scam schemes, if you are too curious to wait).

Condom machine
Condom vending machine in toilet of Tesco Lotus hypermarket in Pattaya

Go-go bars don’t work overnight – their opening hours are from 20 to 1 a.m. They can’t work later as there’s a noise ban, which is especially strict in Bangkok. So if you are interested in bigger choice, plan your visit to a bar from 20 to 22.

Employees are of different ages (it depends on a bar, just go inside and take a brief look to understand, what age category waits for you here). Remember that Asians look much younger (if you care) – it means that the real age you won’t know unless you see the ID (Thai national passport, looks like a plastic card). The price for the services of the staff that is over 40 y.o. is usually lower, and it would be easier to haggle.

In any case avoid hiring the staff under 18 y.o. – it is illegal, don’t put yourself under the risk of several years of imprisonment. Ask to show you the ID – check the year of birth, I remind you that 2001 is 2544 in Thailand.

An employee can decline the offer from unpleasant client. All services are based on free will.

A bar usually consists of 1-2 sections of typical 3-4-storeyed Thai building. The ground floor is for the bar itself – here you can have a drink, chat for a while with the staff you are interested in, make the choice and continue in any other place. Generally there’s a kind of a stage with some poles that is used for shows and for an “exhibition” (the staff dressed in underpants stand there with numbers pinned to pants).

Sometimes you may meet dressed employees outside the bar – they aren’t many. It may surprise you, but the staff can be waiting here for moveable street stalls with food.

The rest of bar’s floors are occupied with rooms, where you can spend time with an employee. Some go-go bars offer rooms with private bathroom, while some of them offer only rooms with one bathroom on the floor (=you can meet other visitors in corridor). Also I would put the cleanliness of sheets, towels etc under a big question.

A visit to a go-go bar in Thailand starts with demand to order a drink (prices start from 150 THB, yep, Coca-Cola and whiskey can be of the same price). If you are ready to make your choice – you can refuse to order a drink, quickly achieve the agreement and leave the bar with a nice employee.

Most of bars are run by a manager. A woman is named “mamasang”, a man – “papasang” (while sometimes a man is called mamasang, kind of a joke). It is usually an older person that knows the staff well. If you have some specific wishes or conditions, share them with mamasang – s/he will offer you the most suitable candidates. Also you can ask mamasang to answer your questions about the staff you like. Then 1 of employees (at your choice) will join you for an “interview”. If your interview will take more than 3-4 questions, you’ll be asked to by a drink for the employee.

Always ask the employee, what s/he is ready to have with you (if s/he is ready to have this or that). Nevertheless, it doesn’t exclude that when it will come to fulfilling your dream, the employee will not be capable or will set his teeth in order to undergo pain despite s/he agreed. This can easily ruin the fantasy.

Term of hiring may vary (I give the lowest prices for Pattaya, in Bangkok these services will cost at least twice more; if in Pattaya you receive an offer with much higher price and haggling is not excepted – probably you’ve chosen expensive bar; my marketing research wasn’t wide enough, it is based on small amount of employees with the age under 30 y.o.):

  • Short time (1 hour), you will get the service right in the bar, in a room upstairs. 500 THB and up.
  • Long time (~for the night; most of the staff will do their best to slip away from sleeping with you – “I need to go to school in the morning”, “My turn to take care of buffalo” etc), this is a “takeaway” option. 800 THB and up.
  • Longer periods, f.e. when you intend to spend a weekend (or a whole vacation) with the employee. Prices are negotiable, and they can be lower than the price of long time.

If you are hiring 1 worker for 2 of you, usually you’ll be charged double rate.

There’s no corellation between price and quality. High rate of employee doesn’t garantee that s/he won’t be like a plastic doll in sex; and the rate of bar fine doesn’t affect cleanliness of the room you’ll be given.

If you want to haggle over the price – do it in the bar and do it with the worker himself (herself). Note: when the price question is settled down, it doesn’t mean that employee won’t ask you for tips, when s/he’ll be leaving you. Especially if we speak about girls.

Besides the rate of employee’s services (that you will pay after you’ve got that service done – don’t agree with manager insisting on prepayment) there’s a bar fine, that you should pay in the bar. Usually bar fine is 300-500 THB. It includes 1 hour of room rent that is located upstairs. It means that when you’ve booked short time – you pay this fine for the room. When you’ve booked long time – you pay it as a commission for the bar that loses 1 employee for this night. If you hire a worker for several days, you can haggle with manager in order to get bar fine discounted, as bar fine is a daily thing (usually manager agrees to reduce it).

If the bar fine is higher than I’ve mentioned – it means that you’ve entered pricey bar or this bar is located in a crowded (with clients) place (=there’s no profit for mamasang to be left with lesser employees here). As an example of such crowded place: Walking Street in Pattaya.

Sexy Thai man in the sea
I needed a sexy pic as an illustration for my article, so I’ve decided to put a pic of my friend (he has nothing to do with sex industry)

In theory you can avoid next bar fine. In the first evening, when you meet an employee in a bar, you hire him/her for long time and you pay the bar fine. But after sex you can ask the employee about telephone number and reach an agreement to have dates without bar involved. But it is a risk for employee – if the manager (other staff) sees him/her with you, s/he can be fired. So this option suits better cases, when you are ready to travel with employee to other destinations.

Hotels that deal with tour operators will charge you (minimum 500 THB), if you want to bring someone (local) in your room. The higher is the level of the hotel – the higher is the rate you’ll be charged.

And it won’t matter, if the worker visits you in daytime or no. Also such hotels demand an ID of your guest to be shown upon his/her arrival. No ID – wave farewell to your plans, intentions and the guest. ID is needed for various purposes – some hotel staff are just curious, while the other take ID and your guest will receive it back only upon his departure, when you confirm that everything is ok. In the 2d case hotel honestly earns these money and takes care of you, while the 1st case seems to be extortion. But these are the rules.

That’s why I highly recommend checking the presence of your employee’s ID right in the bar – also check his/her age. I remind you of several years of imprisonment if the employee is under 18 y.o. 2001 = 2544 in Thailand.

If you live in a guest house, it can have following policy:

  • If you have paid for a double room, but you stay alone – you don’t need to pay anything, even if the guest stays overnight. Just check in your new guest at reception upon his/her arrival.
  • If you are 2 (or you are alone, but you have paid a single room rate) and you stay in a double room, then:
    • Overnight stay will be charged, except cases when no one cares about it.
    • Daytime visitor will be for free as it is just your guest.

Due to this if you are sex tourist and you book a room just for you, it’s more comfortable to book a double room. Most of Thai hotels offer double (twin) rooms only, and single stay will cost you the same price.

Don’t forget to buy condoms in advance, as they are not included in rates and don’t expect that employee will use his/her own. I haven’t seen free condoms in bars either.

All Thais have some skills in Thai massage, so if you need a little massage right now (uncomfortable pose etc) – just ask your employee. S/he won’t be as skillful as professional masseur, but s/he can help to release your pain.

In 99% the service starts with the shower – Thais like cleanliness and they always wonder, how much do we sweat in their climate.

The staff

Freelancers

You will meet freelancers in the streets of famous crowded resorts. F.e. I’ve seen girls in Pattaya on Beach road next to Walking street and boys at gay beach. They definitely work in other areas too, I just didn’t pay much attention. Freelancers can be the first, who will start the talk. All that will happen later is at your own risk.

Yes, freelancers will charge less (at least you don’t need to pay a bar fine). But they care about their health themselves. In go-go bars the staff undergoes medical examination and tests every 3-4 months. Of course it’s not a guarantee, health risks stay high and one should always be safe and use condoms, but it looks/sounds safer.

The only way to be sure that you won’t be given drugs and robbed (while being unconscious) – never drink anything from an open bottle while having a date. If you are thirsty – always open a new sealed bottle.

Also if something happens, you can come the next day to the bar and talk to manager – you know where to start the search. I don’t know if tourist police will help you much (I mean the theft only) – because prostitution is illegal. But it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t go there.

Girls

Let’s start with the most important thing: women-sex-workers and just-women are 2 totally different worlds. If you offer sex to just-women in Thailand, the result will depend on your activity – you can become imprisoned, disabled and even dead. If you need reasons, some of them you will find in the chapter about sex & mindset in Thailand below and some in the article about mindset (I will publish it later).

Aerography with nude girl

Katheoys (ladyboys)

Katheoy is Thai word for a ladyboy. Pronounced like “cut-oy”, “cut” like in “cut with a knife” and “oy” or “oi” like Russian or Brazilian exclamation. The stress is on “o”.

Ladyboys can be hired in the same bars, where girls work. Let me answer the most popular question right:

How to distinguish Thai ladyboy from a woman? – The only way is to Ask.

You can write down tons of advices and tips from the web, how to do it, and despite of it you will make a mistake. Of course I don’t mean cases, when it’s obvious – a person is on the way (or got stuck on this way) to female look and speaks with low male voice.

That’s why if you want to avoid hiring katheoy, tell to the manager “No katheoy!” or “No ladyboy!”. And do it several times, until you see the understanding in his/her eyes. Also feel free to ask the employee, if she is transgender or no. In this case you won’t discover a dick in your bed.

Answers to some other popular questions:

Why are there so many ladyboys in Thailand?

They aren’t many – the same quantity as in other countries. They just concentrate in certain places. Secondly Thai cultural level is much higher than in other countries (even in mine) – transsexuals don’t need to hide that much, as there are no evil people that will harm them intentionally.

Why most of shemales in Thailand are occupied in sex industry?

It happens not only in Thailand. Today’s girls were born male. And they were raised like boys. It means that sex is a standard thing to them and not a shamy thing (like it is brought in girls’ minds even in well-developed countries).

All these shocking headlines about Thai ladyboys being brought up as mushrooms for sale – are nothing but lies of dimwitted people and low quality press that intend to gain cheap popularity. If you really want to know what transsexuality is about, try to read at least articles in Wikipedia.

Mannequin shows boob
Even mannequins want to express some debauchery in Pattaya

Boys

Boys for both girls and gays can be found in the same bars. In Pattaya these are the bars in streets of Boyz Town. Girls, don’t be shy, just enter gay bars and ask about:

  • a guy for you (there is a good quantity of bisexual workers),
  • the size and
  • duration of the act.

The question about duration is very important, because among shows and entertainments that offer bars to their visitors there’s one that affects duration badly: clients give money to arrange the prize. And some guys (the staff) need to jerk off in front of public – who will be the first to cum gets the money. As you understand, short duration brings them money, but it won’t bring pleasure to you.

Boys Town
Boyz Town in Pattaya – for gays and straight girls

Scam schemes

All Thai scam schemes start with playing in love. At first you hire a worker that you like. Later you start to hire him/her every evening. Then the worker offers you to avoid bar fine (as if s/he cares of your money) and takes a “vacation” to spend it with you.

I remind that bars don’t like, when their staff works without them.

The worker’s behavior seems to be perfect. And when you leave Thailand, you exchange your contacts to stay in touch… The game has started. Bad actor will start right now, a good one can wait until you spend another one vacation with him/her. The task is to take money out of you (usually it’s a kind of begging) – the reasons can be different – ill buffalo, unhealthy mother, lost ID card and God only knows what else.

To understand that you are being cheated, you need:

  • To get rid of your emotions (love, care etc).
  • Listen to your feelings – cheating is never unnoticeable.
  • Find contradictions:
    • Facts (f.e. lost ID card can be easily restored in any passport office in any settlement of Thailand for only 30 THB in the same day).
    • Style (letter with a sad story is much longer than all other letters that you have ever exchanged; your beloved doesn’t have the level of English that is used in this e-mail or s/he surely can not know such phrases).
    • The amount of money (usually it is adapted to a budget of a European or an American, that’s why f.e. Russians will wonder, why does s/he need that much. For Europeans and Americans it won’t be that obvious, but if there’s a money question, I highly recommend comparing the amount to Thai prices).
  • Answer that you’ve got no money for now (or you’ve got problems with money transfer) and take a look at the way s/he will respond. And when it goes about problems with ID card – just give sincere advice, as I wrote above, to visit the closest passport office.

All these language things happen because the text of letter is handed from one employee to another. Like a lucky wedding dress – from one bride to another: “if I was lucky, probably you’ll be lucky too”. To compose one’s own letter is no sanook.

Nevertheless there are honest people among sex workers too. And life is such an unpredictable thing, you’ll never know, what happens next…

Little scam

Little scam is based on the same love game, but it starts much earlier. The scam is when s/he starts to say: “Buy me”. If you hear this, run away as soon as possible. Later everything will become worse. You are the client, and you decide what and whom you will buy.

Of course I don’t mean a bottle of water or a portion of rice. And if you visit a restaurant/museum/cinema with your employee – this is an escort service and it’s you, who has to pay for his/her food/ticket etc besides the money you pay for the escort service itself.

Condoms

Bars aimed for wasting your time

Usually these bars are open to the street (at least one side has no wall). There are always Thai women (their age depends on the bar) that are waiting for you. Such bars are open since noon. And if a man passes them by, women start to sing loudly “hello sexy man” and other “sweet” things in order to gain your attention.

Probably if one is over 60 y.o., it’s a pleasant thing to hear, but I always feel myself uncomfortable and try to hide from it. Especially loud they start to yell, when they see a farang younger than 45 y.o. Well, one can understand their wish to choose the client that they will like.

The profit of such business is in the money your waste drinking and buying drinks to these women. Can there be sex, depends on each case, but you are free to ask. Probably when I’ll be 80 y.o., I’ll be enjoying wasting my money for their drinks while young 40-y.o. girls touch my gray-haired knees and laugh at my jokes. But today I don’t understand, what’s the interest to visit such bars, when there’s even no one to talk to – the level of English of the staff is poor, despite of their need to make you spend more time in the bar.

Never ring a bell in a bar.

You will notice a bell in some bars. Usually there’s a note that if one rings the bell, he buys drinks for everyone in the bar (or for all the staff). But some bars don’t have a note, while the staff is interested in your generosity – their salary consists of commission that they get for the drinks, you’ve bought.

Strange restaurant-bar-karaoke

I even don’t know how to name this category, but if I have the aim to tell you everything that concerns sex tourism in Thailand in 1 article, I need to tell you about it. First of all, I don’t think that you will visit such place unintentionally. That’s why I will describe the full scam scenario:

Bangkok. Early evening. Tourist area (f.e. next to Khaosan Road). A Thai man approaches you (you are a man that is walking alone). The man is politely dressed (neither poor nor rich), his level of English seems to be at least higher than intermediate and he’s able to keep the conversation going. He says that he is f.e. English teacher that spends his vacation in Bangkok: “Don’t you want to join me sightseeing?” If you agree, you will go to visit a temple – tuk-tuk or taxi will be paid 50/50. And you won’t spend much time in that temple – he’s rather quick in praying.

Then he may offer to see another sight. When you’re done with that, he says: “Let’s go to a restaurant” and adds (or doesn’t add) “with beautiful girls”. If you agree, you will be brought to that strange place – spacious dark room with tables surrounded by little sofas and a stage. The stage is occupied with the only activity – girls (the staff dressed in short dresses), one by one, enter the scene and sing karaoke. And they do it rather bad. One can invite these girls to join – this is what your new acquaintance does.

The scam is in the presence of girls next to you (even if they don’t drink or eat) – it’s not free. When you get the bill, it is in Thai and generally there’s only the whole amount. If you ask to write down every position, they will bring it even with bigger sum (“Oh, sorry, we’ve forgotten that you had ordered this too”). Precarious food will cost much also. Your Thai companion will offer to pay the bill 50/50 and he will show with his behavior that the price even low for such nice girls and service. In fact: you would never visit this place without his assistance and you would never pay that much.

I don’t get what advantage brings the presence of these girls – their English skills are poor + as far as I understand you are not allowed to touch them constantly or hire as sex workers. Most of customers in these strange restaurants are Asians, 60+.

Sexy Thai guy
Yep, this is the next pic of my friend that has nothing to do with sex industry

Dating applications

All free applications for dates (that we use in Europe & America) in Thailand seem to be occupied with sex workers. Even if you write in the headline of your profile “I don’t pay $ for sex”, they will contact you. They start dialog and in the end it appears that the meeting will be not for free. I recommend to save time and to ask about it straight, if you don’t want to waste your plans for the evening.

Sometimes the price of sex services is hidden inside the question: “Will you pay my transport costs?” But somehow it happens that f.e. in Pattaya transport costs reach 500 THB (take a look at the price of short time sex and discover that it is the same). And when you answer: “Ok, I’ll give you 20 THB for songthaew”, s/he disappears.

Yes, there are Thai people that use these applications for dating and not for prostitution, but they are a few. All these empty chats distract me from using dating applications in Thailand, probably I’m too impatient and too occupied on my trips. My experience – 2 dates with Thais and a 4 day relationship in the end of trip with expat – all this in 3,5 weeks.

The highest activity is of course in Pattaya. In silent towns like Cha Am dating applications seem to be useless. Also you will meet Thai virtuals (that even had no intention to get acquainted in reality). While it’s easier to find an expat or a tourist like you, well, who knows, probably a destiny too. 🙂

A couple in the sea

Sex show

Probably you’ve heard of the sex show before, from friends or web. The most popular sex show is in Pattaya. And it is far from Walking street, it’s in club “69” (coordinates: 12°57’13.0″N 100°53’30.9″E (12.953620, 100.891906)). It’s hard to recommend any show, ‘cause you never know how it changed through years. Yep, I’ve visited sex show in club “69” on my first trip to Thailand.

Before entering auditorium you’ll be asked to leave your gadgets and cameras. The auditorium is a small amphitheater with ~6 rows forming a semicircle around the stage. Show goes non-stop – it means that when it began to repeat, you can leave or stay and watch it one more time. One by one visitors leave auditorium and you get the chance to have a seat closer to the stage.

Take Pattaya map with you – just click the star and it will be saved in your Google account. Any locations in this region that I will add later will appear on your map.

There’s a variety of scenes to surprise or shock you including sex on the stage and in first row, balloons being shot with arrows pushed out of vagina etc. Just ask in any street agency, if this is THE show, I think they’ll bring you to the right one. (I was asking in tour agency located in “Russian” street next to Pattaya Park hotel, they have it). Some say that the price of ticket sold in the club “69” is the same as the price at any street tour agency (~500 THB in 2019).

But if you buy this “tour” at the agency, you’ll get one-way transfer for free.

A friend of mine had visited several shows in Walking street and told me: “They are worse: short program and most of shocking tricks are absent”. From one hand he’s an expert and I’d rather see the show 1 time but it will be the best one. From the other hand – who knows, if an alternative show has appeared there?

Scam with sex shows

Scam schemes with sex shows can be different. I will mention 2 of them. This one happens in Pattaya in Walking street – a barker approaches you and shows a list of everything you can see in the show. If you agree, he takes you to the place. You wait for an hour but the show doesn’t even seem to start. Let me disappoint you: you won’t see anything and nobody will return your money. Even tourist police can’t take more than a half out of them.

The other scheme is when a barker promises you a free sex show and drinks for reasonable prices (f.e. 100 THB). But then you get the bill with thousands of baht – the barker has disappeared and angry staff demands money. Show can be absent too.

That’s why it’s more safe to buy a “tour” at tour agency (even some tour operators can arrange it for you).

“Massage” with a “bonus” and body to body massage

Never try to check with you hands, whether a masseur is ready to have sex with you – it’s rude and you can get into troubles – do it with your voice only.

Most of Thai massage parlors (even in Pattaya) are medical institutions.

So, how it happens, when you get offered cock massage also. Bangkok, one of massage parlors next to Baiyoke Sky hotel, just a usual Thai parlor with timid staff. We were 3: 1 girl and 2 guys. Matresses in a massage room were separated with wooden boxes (~2 m high). A girl started to massage me, while I began to fall asleep.

Suddenly I felt that she stopped – I had opened 1 eye and noticed that the other cuter girl was taking her place. She started massage, but her movements were too soft to be right. Silently she asked me, whether she can massage me in “that area”. I said that I’m not alone, meaning that my beloved is in the next box. Without any shame she answered: “We can continue in the other room and then you’ll return back”. To get rid of her and to get back the first, professional, masseur I had to reject her proposals 4 times.

After massage I was complaining to my companions, it appeared that only I got that “lucky” offer of advanced massage. So if you suddenly feel jealous about your boyfriend entering a massage parlor, probably you should choose another one, where you can lie next to each other.

Topless sunbathing
I guess this tourist doesn’t know that topless sunbathing is illegal in Thailand. But it doesn’t mean that she won’t be arrested

The second option is body to body massage. If you want it, you need to visit parlors that offer it. It’s a pricey thing (comparing to other types of medical massage), I’ve never seen a price less than 800 THB. Body to body massage means that both of you undress, masseur puts oil on your body and makes massage with use of his/her body. Sometimes s/he can agree (or suggest) to masturbate or suck you, or even have sex with you after massage, for additional price of course.

I’ve never visited body to body massage as it’s not interesting to me and there’s a way to pay less – I prefer to hire a sex worker that is ready for everything for long time in a go-go bar. If you want body to body massage – just buy a bottle of oil and do everything you want to in your room, all night and not only massage.

Some history about prostitution in Thailand

Long time ago prostitution in Thailand was taxed and legal. Of course prostitution is not the thing that is usually mentioned in historical documents, but the evidences of 15th-18th centuries exist. Prostitution was disapproved but it hadn’t been criminalized. Until 1950s when the prime minister began to demonize this sphere and sex workers resulting a law that was passed in 1960 (under pressure of the UNO also) and made prostitution in Thailand illegal.

The next chapter of prostitution in Thailand was started by the USA – during the Vietnam War they have used Thailand as “relax and recreation” facility. And Thais decided to offer some sex services for “export”. Later American soldiers shared their memories of sex tourism experience in a small unknown village of Pattaya. And step by step illegal prostitution turned a village to a world famous sex tourism resort.

Since then many years have passed, but everything remains the same: Thailand gets offended by Gambia, when its tourism minister claims Thailand to be sex destination instead of Gambia; new ministers of tourism in Thailand share ideas about how to get rid of prostitution; while nothing changes for tourists and sex workers.

In the beginning of 2000s there was a project of law that aimed to legalize prostitution, but it was not approved. Some narrow-minded people with their unnatural view to ethics don’t want to see that the legalization would not only bring 6,5-billion (USD) industry out of shade, but help its victims (some sources state that 1 of every 20 sex workers in Thailand is/was enslaved).

Thai couple at the beach
Thais don’t show their tenderness in public as much as Europeans or Americans do

Thai mindset, sex & prostitution – contradictions

To make you understand what happens in Thai minds, I will give you a list of superstitions and facts. Pay attention at contradictions – they can easily live in one mind at the same time.

– Prostitution is considered to be a part of the social fabric of Thailand.

– According to researches Thais disapprove prostitution. But the stigma is less severe than in other countries – supporting their parents is considered to be a good deed of most sex workers. (It reminds stereotypes in some countries, where sex workers are considered to be only “poor girls that were enslaved” or “no education = prostitution is the only way to earn enough”. But when it comes to a “poor girl” that appeared to be one’s own daughter/sister/etc, somehow all the compassion disappears, as she “puts shame on the family”).

– Thai sex workers prefer to work far from their home, so the family won’t know about their occupation – workers create a legend for them. (Due to it only absent-minded person can post their pictures on the web without their agreement telling the entire world about their occupation).

– Ordinary Thais prefer to stay tolerant towards any people (even if they are outcast).

– “Prostitution is a foundation of vices”.

– It is considered Thai sex industry to be focused on tourists. In fact “locals for locals” branch of sex was not explored, while in Thai yellow press you can find news about sexual exploits of some Thai officials.

– “Prostitution reduces the amount of rapes”.

– Many Thais (both genders) believe that men need more sex than women. And women can easier control their desire. In fact this “easier” happens because:

– Female infidelity is strongly frowned upon in Thailand.

– Sex life of a single woman is disapproved by Thai society. Today step by step Thai women gain less disapproval of having premarital relationship and the condition that a bride should be a virgin is slowly fading away too. But in the same time:

– Sex in life of a single man (premarital, casual) is awaited and accepted by Thai society, and sometimes even encouraged. (Don’t break your brain searching for any logics – it’s absent. I mean, who a man should sleep with, if he’s not bisexual, and sex for a single woman is bad for her reputation. These are intrapersonal contradictions of society that need centuries to be cured).

– Sex with a prostitute for any Thai man is acceptable in society, but it doesn’t mean that every Thai man goes for it.

– Extramarital sex of Thai man is accepted by society. But it doesn’t mean that his wife won’t kill him, because only:

– Some Thais (women & men) consider that a man needs variation in sex partners.

– A few Thai women accept mia noi (minor wife, mistress). Attitude of society I will describe with a quotation of one Thai politician: “To have a mistress is an individual’s right. There should be no problem as long as the politician causes no trouble to his family or society”.

– A prostitute is preferable for extramarital sex, as she is perceived as less threatening the marriage.

Thai eye

When you’ll be visiting Thailand, pay attention at young Thai couples – they do not kiss or hug all the time in public, even if they are already married. By the way, one can be excluded, if s/he had kissed on the territory of school or university. Thai society comes with very slow steps to freedom from patriarchy and religious mistakes that are bad for health.

About brave man, who won the fight against Thai superstitions about sexual health, you can read here.

Afterword

Now you know how everything goes with sex in Thailand. But I want to remind you to take care of your health: use condoms during any type of sex (including oral). Also I should warn you that there are no insurances that cover sexually transmitted diseases. And HIV, AIDS, hepatitis B and C are incurable and make the life much more complicated.

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